Breakfast trust


Call me crazy, but I don’t always trust runny eggs and coffee on a Monday morning.

I just don’t trust that they will work together in harmony.  They’ve failed me one to many times.  On a Sunday, yes.  Sundays have all the comforts of home… just in case, you know?

But a Monday?  I need my eggs to be good and solid.  Or non existent.  I might be more prone to trusting  oatmeal on a Monday. 

Buttons!


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Just check out these fantastic buttons I received from ‘There will be Buttons’ on Etsy! 

I was browsing the site, trying to find something perfect for my husband, when Lieutenant Dan appeared with his ice cream cone and his headband.  Could it be any more perfect?  I think not.

Of course, to order a single button would be ludicrous.  Why, the $1 spent on the tiny button would be overshadowed by the $2 shipping fee.  And why order one, single, solitary, silly button when there are so many buttons to choose from?

I mean… Nell?? A coy looking Pee Wee?? And Buzz?  I want them all!!

I did not originally want Mr. Rogers, however.  I really wanted this fantastic Wayne’s World quote, but, alas, it was on another button site and I couldn’t get it…without ordering 7-10 buttons from that person.  I might still order it.  I’m not sure yet.  I do love silly buttons. Who am I kidding? I’m probably going to order it today.

Although I’m not sure who else I know loves to wear silly buttons.  Definitely not my husband… but he’s getting Lt. Dan and he’s going to love it.  If only he were just a little more geeky…then I could order all the things that make me giggle and I would giggle all the live long day!!

Thank you, button makers of the world!!

I’m sorry I’m posting your license plate online…


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Yes, I know it probably isn’t very cool to take a picture of someone’s license plate and post it on the internet for all to see….however, a plate like this is just begging for attention!  I was so intrigued by who might create such a clever personalized plate.

I mean, it’s D’Shizzit, right?  Maybe it’s Snoop-D-O-double G!

Or perhaps the driver Dishes it?  Like a lunchlady…or like a prosecuting attorney?

Maybe it’s about a thug robbing jewelry?  ‘Dis Heist!

I could’ve interpreted it all wrong….it could simply be a creative way of spelling Diseased.  That’s a shame.

Snowy blog!


I am so happy the snow has continued on my blog.  I enabled this feature years ago…and have since switched up the look and layout…and I thought that I had lost it.  But, the snow remains!!  I think it only happens in December.

WordPress people?  Anyone?  Geek Squad?  Answer my rhetorical questions…

Snow.

I love it!  What a wonderful surprise.  If you are reading this and it is any month other than December…well, there’s no snow.  Too fucking bad.

We name our Christmas trees


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This tradition has been passed down three generations of trees.  A measly three years in human time, yet who knows how long in the land of trees.  It is a tradition I hope survives the test of time, and with proper documentation…in the form of a family ‘tree’ (ha!), I hope that years from now we can look back and giggle a little bit.  In the beginning, it seemed to be a silly little game we played, but now we look forward to it.  The adoption and naming of the tree.

It began three years ago with grandfather tree.  His name: Tree Tree.  Simple, precise, to the point.

His legacy lived on last year through his son: Red Green.  Colorful, upbeat, and festive.

This year, we have a beautiful, majestic, sophisticated tree.  Grand-daughter of Tree Tree, daughter of Red Green…

Treela Pinewood.

 

I finally had another dream about Eddie Vedder


Thank goodness.  I’ve had many sleeps since my last dream with an Eddie appearance. 

It began at a show. Not a Pearl Jam show, but a sort of lip sync/air guitar variety show.  I was chosen to perform a Tom Petty tune and was pretty stoked to show my skills.  I recall having an awfully strange, blonde, Paige boy wig on.  Perhaps it was my actual hair.  I know not. 

As another performer was onstage, I spotted Eddie. I approached him knowing he would respect that I was in the show.  He was Eddie… although his face was young, pink and dewy, with no beard or sexy stubble in sight.  His curly hair was to his ears and it was so greasy and shiny.  Each curl around his face was shorter and more defined.  Maybe it was because of there being no beard on his face, but his teeth looked bigger and a little bit buck-toothed. 

I approached him and said something to the effect of: Hi Eddie, I just wanted to say that I was at the show in Milwaukee.  Great show, thank you.

The look of confusion and disgust on his shiny unfamiliar face sank my warm, adoring heart.  I walked away, head hanging low… onto my Tom Petty performance.

On stage, I strummed the first bars of the song on my imaginary guitar and leaned into the microphone to lip the opening line of the song.  To my dismay, I lipped the wrong words!! And then my guitar strumming became off beat!! The horror!!

I glanced over at Eddie after my on-stage nose dive.  He shook his glistening head in even more disgust at me.  I felt pitiful. 

Although it wasn’t the dream I dream about… where we become best friends and he brings me on tour to entertain him… I am grateful to have his strangely shiny presence grace my brain.

First lights


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I’m officially one of ‘those’ people.  You know the type, they feel all festive and merry and put up their holiday lights before anyone else to show everyone on the block just how festive they are.  They even put up their lights before Thanksgiving!  Blasphemous!

I’ve never been one of those people.  But this year, I tell ya, I’ve had that holiday spirit thing for over 2 weeks now. 

My justification is that I have kids.  But in all honesty, I’m pretty sure I wrote a post roughly 2 years ago whining grinchily about the holiday season.  The kids existed then. Yeah, I wasn’t feeling it that year.  But last year I watched Home Alone at least 10 times and an assortment of other Christmas cheer movies probably every single day. The spirit crept up on me. This year it’s even worse. 

I even researched into the origins of Christmas so I felt a little less guilty about enjoying it and not being full blown Christian.  I find the spirit of Yule and winter solstice much more appealing.  I read about so many interesting regions and cultures celebrating the change of season in their own way.  I now have a potpurri of new holiday beliefs and traditions.

Saturnalia, you’re drunk…go home. 

So, yes, I put up our lights and I love them. I didn’t turn them on right away… for fear of being one of those people.  I planned on waiting until after Thanksgiving.  Thanksgiving deserves its day.  Then it snowed and everything changed.  Everything changed!  I mean, I just can’t resist now.  It’s like these lights are Skittles and I just can’t resist that sweet rainbow! I find snow illuminated with twinkly lights to be one of my favorite winter time things. 

We’re at now now


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Oh, Spaceballs! Rick Moranis… Such joy.

I introduced the children to this gem last week. Lovely #2 thought Pizza the Hut was disgusting…with his drippy cheesy face and tongue.

Ah, sweet nostalgia. I think my brother and I used to watch this movie nearly every weekend at our neighbor’s house. His mom always made us popcorn and cut up some pears, which we barely touched. It never really got old… and now that it’s old, it still hasn’t really gotten old.

Just look at that big ass helmet. Ludicrous!


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This is how you make a home-made band-aid.  Tear off a little piece of paper towel and hold it over the tiny little knife wound on your pinky…the one you got after you accidentally grazed the knife as it laid there, innocently.  The cut that shouldn’t have happened.  The cut that now leaves an annoying little flap of skin too deep to rip off…but perfect to get caught on sweaters once it has crusted over a bit.   Then fumble around for some scotch tape.

Try to hold the paper towel on your finger and also retrieve enough pieces of tape to cover all of the paper towel.  Despite the awkward finger fumbling of the sticky substance, you must succeed.  We have to cover it all because there is still celery to chop and carrots to peel for this fucking delicious pot roast…and the dreaded tear inducing onions….and you sure don’t want any onion juices seeping into that fresh little cut.  You just started!! You can’t back out now!

Of course, this while process could have been avoided had you just bought the damn $3 Frozen movie themed bandages…the ones that aren’t sticky and are too small for an adult sized wound.  They’re more like decorative stickers.  And why doesn’t Target deliver??