My business, my bizznass


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I know that I almost always talk about my love of grunge and Pearl Jam, but I bet you didn’t know that I like hip hop.  I bet you didn’t know that I saw a kid politely swallow his vomit instead of throw it up all over the jam-packed, sardined crowd last week at the Ludacris show.  A kind gesture!  I bet you (nor anyone) have no idea what kind of drugs make you want to chew on other people’s hair.  I saw a dude chewing on a mouthful of blonde hair…blonde hair that belonged to the girl in front of him.  What is wrong with these kids?  I swear, I’m going to beat my girls’ asses if they ever do weird ass drugs.  Seriously.

I bet you can guess what I said when my friend asked if we wanted to go to a super secret Ludacris show at a club after his big show.  Um…..yeah, what would you say?  What would you say even if you thought it might not be true and that your Doc Marten wearing ass would never even get into a club in a million years?  You say yes, mother fuckers.  You say yes…

And despite it not really being a show and despite paying a ridiculously high cover charge and despite being dressed for a bonfire in 50 degree weather…I still danced my white girl ass off and had a blast doing it.  I am pretty positive that Ludacris and his group had a good laugh at my expense….because there was no one else dancing except this super tall caramel macchiato girl who I know from a few jobs ago.  She met Ludacris.  She’s hot.  I am not hot.

So did I meet Ludacris?  No.  Were we in the same club 10 feet away from each other?  Totally.  Did I swarm their group and try to take a photo with him?  No.  Did I take off my clothes and give him a lap dance to try to get some celebrity attention??  Absolutely not.  Will I continue to tell people that I partied with Ludacris?  Abso-fucking-lutely.  Because it was an after party.  We partied.  I put myself out there and acted like myself and had a great time.  And I think about what I might have said…and I really think that I would tell him about the vomit swallower and try to make him laugh.

I have serious respect for Ludacris.  I will also admit that I now have a small obsession with him and if I ever make a movie based on a book based on my life (super original right? hardy har har har)…well, he will just have to be a part of that project.  Oh, he’s the one in the striped shirt in the photo…btw.

BTW…I partied with Ludacris!

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One thought on “My business, my bizznass

  1. Pingback: Malfunction…. | The Brain of Kate

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